This is turning into more of a novella, so I'm breaking it up into parts. Plus, it's so much that I'm having trouble even editing & organizing my thoughts as I really have no time without the little ones needing help with their homework, a snack, or are referee. So instead of this being yet ANOTHER post I don't publish....here is so far...unedited (kind of)
PART ONE:
From the moment we are able to walk, form words, eat on our own, we are thrown into a world where we are
So, we do it. Some do it all happily, some miserably. Some do 80% happily, some do 10% & have the balls to say F this. Some of us though, in the middle of doing it all, slowly but surely, lose our souls. We lose our identities, have to sacrifice our dreams.
The funny thing is, is that "failing" is if we do not sacrifice, if we do not follow these set of guidelines. "Failing" IS following our dreams. Because rarely, by following this formula, are we following our dreams. Are you following me?
We get through our childhood & adolescence. Some happily gliding through with no glitches (at least we on the outside think so). Some survive by the skin of their teeth; miserably with horrific home lives, school lives, & internal conflicts, pressure from parents, illnesses or handicaps. Unless life is tragically cut short, without a moment to come up for air, we are onto the next stage of our lives. To find "the one", figure out what the hell we're going to do with the rest our lives forced into making a decision before we even know who we are.
The ones who do it "right", go to college, find the love of their lives, graduate on time with a promising career waiting for them the day after graduation. Some of us take our sweet time, rebelling against the "right" way to do it, figuring out who we are, & "failing" in the eyes of everyone else. But maybe we make it by the skin of our teeth, marry in time to have children, squeeze in a decent career & redeem the "failure" we were when we were happily, freely living our lives. Although, in our eyes, the confines of this institution look glamorous & tie our lives up into a nice neat little package called The American Dream.
But wait a minute. It ain't over yet!
Marriage & children begin the process of compromising. Compromising EVERYTHING. Not always. Some are lucky? I think? Couples that agree on EVERYTHING. In the beginning, small compromises. What kind of cake are we serving at the wedding, what music are we playing at the reception, WHERE are we even having the wedding. If you're lucky, after all the decisions, the stress, making the big leap is exciting. If not, one of us starts losing ourselves in the decision making process witnessing how one another handles stress, makes decisions, & handles it all. Some of us make it & still like each other by the time we are done. Some of us start seeing a different side of this Prince or Princess Charming we fell in complete love with & start the process of convincing ourselves that it's o.k., that we love this person & it doesn't matter. "I do".
Yay! We're married! Some are relieved. Parents are relieved Whew! My kid is normal & on their way to success! Finally! Some are scared. Anxiety & fears may start to set in after the party & reality hits. This is it. Either way, we are in it....forever holding our peace, forever tied by one decision, by one day, one piece of paper, & everyone's tears of joy.
(PART TWO for my MILLIONS of readers;-) is on it's way!
The funny thing is, is that "failing" is if we do not sacrifice, if we do not follow these set of guidelines. "Failing" IS following our dreams. Because rarely, by following this formula, are we following our dreams. Are you following me?
We get through our childhood & adolescence. Some happily gliding through with no glitches (at least we on the outside think so). Some survive by the skin of their teeth; miserably with horrific home lives, school lives, & internal conflicts, pressure from parents, illnesses or handicaps. Unless life is tragically cut short, without a moment to come up for air, we are onto the next stage of our lives. To find "the one", figure out what the hell we're going to do with the rest our lives forced into making a decision before we even know who we are.
The ones who do it "right", go to college, find the love of their lives, graduate on time with a promising career waiting for them the day after graduation. Some of us take our sweet time, rebelling against the "right" way to do it, figuring out who we are, & "failing" in the eyes of everyone else. But maybe we make it by the skin of our teeth, marry in time to have children, squeeze in a decent career & redeem the "failure" we were when we were happily, freely living our lives. Although, in our eyes, the confines of this institution look glamorous & tie our lives up into a nice neat little package called The American Dream.
But wait a minute. It ain't over yet!
Marriage & children begin the process of compromising. Compromising EVERYTHING. Not always. Some are lucky? I think? Couples that agree on EVERYTHING. In the beginning, small compromises. What kind of cake are we serving at the wedding, what music are we playing at the reception, WHERE are we even having the wedding. If you're lucky, after all the decisions, the stress, making the big leap is exciting. If not, one of us starts losing ourselves in the decision making process witnessing how one another handles stress, makes decisions, & handles it all. Some of us make it & still like each other by the time we are done. Some of us start seeing a different side of this Prince or Princess Charming we fell in complete love with & start the process of convincing ourselves that it's o.k., that we love this person & it doesn't matter. "I do".
Yay! We're married! Some are relieved. Parents are relieved Whew! My kid is normal & on their way to success! Finally! Some are scared. Anxiety & fears may start to set in after the party & reality hits. This is it. Either way, we are in it....forever holding our peace, forever tied by one decision, by one day, one piece of paper, & everyone's tears of joy.
(PART TWO for my MILLIONS of readers;-) is on it's way!
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