Sibling Rivalry & 2 Disciplinary Apps that every Mommy Needs

Being an only child, I have very little experience with sibling rivalry obviously. The main exposure I had of it was my best friend & her little sister. WHOA: MMA fighters in the making. I was witness to many a fight perpetuated by screaming, hitting, & hair pulling that ended in scratches, bruises, bald spots...ok, no bald spots.... nevertheless, they were BAD. In addition to this experience, from observation & talking to people with siblings, fighting, not talking to, & general dislike for each other is not uncommon.

For me, who always WANTED a big sister/brother, or little sister/brother, not only has it been perplexing, it's so sad. Don't get me wrong, being an only child has its ++s, & I understand how spoiled we only children look on the outside & most of us ARE spoiled in many ways. But playing alone most of the time & having no one to share family miseries joys such going to the park, therapy vacationing, even just going to the grocery store can not only be terribly boring, but us "onlies" miss out on the opportunity to have a permanent playmate & friend for life.

When I got pregnant with our second girl, I was OVERJOYED with the idea of having two girls that would have each other to lean on. A perennial best friend for the rest of their lives. To have what I didn't have. Little did I know.....

From the minute big sister met little sister at the hospital, the bittersweet dynamic of sisterly love & hate was born. Through my "research" I was aware of the possible jealousy the older sibling experiences, & thought I was prepared - HA! - I was sadly mistaken. Nothing could have prepared me for the roller coaster I was about to be led on.

The last 4 years since little sister was born, the majority of my parenting feels like it's been devoted to securing big sister. Making her feel as important, as loved, as precious as her little sister. From day one, as much as big sister absolutely ADORES her little sister, we have had to protect the little one from the other maniac. Now that the little one is getting a bit older, the one way street has become a 2 way street & they are now BOTH almost equal participants. As much as I have tried push the whole "howluckyyouaretohaveeachother" gig, 90% of every day is spent refereeing the little monkeys. I could go on & on about this, & probably will in another post, but the main purpose of this post was to tell all of you (all...2..of you? are you guys still there?), about a couple of phone apps that are saving me from killing myself.

1. Behavior Status App for Android (Traffic Light for iPhone & iPad)

2. Reward Chart App for Android (iReward for iPhone & iPad)

O........................................................M..........................................................G

The apps allow the user to input customized areas of discipline. Since my main concern has been the fighting, I have rewards for "being kind" & disciplinary action (change in color zone which could lead to "timeout") when there is a fight ensuing.

I have tried everything, you name it. (Seriously, "name it" in the comments as I would love to know if there is something I have not tried).

Over a dozen different charts I have either downloaded or created myself, "Good Girl Bucks" I spent more time in designing than using, disciplinary straws, money, bribery, guilt trips, timeouts...everything. The main problem is is MY lack of commitment to them. Finally, I decided I have to accept my shortcomings & work with what I KNOW I will use. Apps. They are TOTALLY.....WORKING. Mainly because they are EASY to use & keep track of on my phone which I always have in case of my turn in Words or Dice emergencies.

I highly suggest it.

Ok well, I had better get back to my well-behaved ;-) kids...