I don't know if you've noticed, but I have sort of a "love/hate" relationship with this blog. I've even thought of starting completely over with a new one thinking maybe I'd be more inclined to write without whatever the "thing" is that keeps me from writing in this one now. That "thing" is checking to see how many hits I've gotten, how many subscribers I have, feeling intimidated by the rockstar Mommy Bloggers out there and feeling that I'll never measure up. That "thing" becomes writing for the reader and not for myself. This has been my problem my whole life with most everything I do. I look too much to the outside for approval. If I don't get it, I get discouraged and usually quit. Or, I get too stressed out by pressuring myself to be better. Then, I move onto something else, and the cycle repeats.
Anyway, I've decided to at least stop checking my subscriber list. I don't have the service that counts hits anymore and I'll deal if I don't get any comments. I know, I sound so pathetic, but it's the truth. I am going to just start writing for myself. Maybe my writing won't measure up, but I really just need a place to - you know - do this.
So, now what I really want to write about:
MY STOMACH - or shall we say - "BELLY". I owe it all to the frckn Winchell's that opened up 5 blocks from our house. Seriously annoying. I was doing so good too! Back at my fighting weight, feeling normal when I sit down with maybe a little overhang, but a reasonable amount. Now, it's major overhangage. Like the kind on an overweight man that maybe is wearing his belt a couple notches too tight. I was going to illustrate it, but I'm too lazy. Probably part of the reason I look like an overweight fella.
Speaking of lazy, I really don't enjoy "Yo Gabba Gabba". What's the relationship you ask? That I'm too lazy to get off my now, squishy bottom, to play or do a craft or something with my daughter so she is not, yet again, watching Nick Jr.
Btw, don't know why I named this post what I did.
6 comments:
For what it's worth, I look forward to your new posts. I don't think I'm a 'subscriber' to your blog, but I do have you in my sidebar and I check for updates every time I log in.
Hope all is well with you and your family!
I think a lot like you do. I write for "someone" else. I am not sure who. I think if I don't post, I will disappoint someone. My family is always saying...are you going to post today. Then I wind up posting way too often. Or, I leave someone a comment and don't hear back and I get discouraged.
Do it only for yourself. That is truly the only way to do it. I agree w Michele. I always look forward to reading your blog. You are funny and witty and REAL!! I miss you when you are gone!!
ps....Happy Mother's Day to you!
Awwwww! You guys are too sweet!!! Thanks so much. Even though I'm going to try not to depend on readers, it sure does feel nice to come here and see your heart-warming comments. Happy Belated Mommy's Days to you both!
Teehee... I don't subscribe here anymore, but I have you on my reader!
Are you still out there? I've missed you!
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