10. Do not sit down. Ever. If you do, be prepared to feel anxious, guilty and unproductive.
9. Bite your tongue. Always. If you don't, the 10 million things your husband and kids do to annoy you, that you don't keep to yourself, will only cause an "unhappy" atmosphere.
8. Do everything yourself. If you don't, be prepared for the things that you are NOT doing yourself, to not be done to your standards. Let me revise that: be prepared for the things you're not doing to not be done at all.
7. Do not sleep. You don't have time.
6. Do not do anything for yourself. If you do, be prepared to feel anxious, guilty, and unproductive.
5. Create and maintain several lists you go back and forth looking at and for, checking off 2 - 3 items at a time. Because you're nothing if you can't do 4 things at the same time.
4. Keep everything in tip-top shape at all times. If you don't, be prepared for the one thing that is out of place to reflect on your household skills and how disorganized you truly are.
3. Look good. If you don't, be prepared to look as if you are overwhelmed, can't take care of yourself, and...not good.
2. Smile at all times. If you don't, be prepared for the bottom falling out. Because if you're not happy - no one is!
1. Put all your hopes, dreams and desires aside. Your only desire should be to have a perfect household.
NOTE TO READER: The author of this post has succeeded in fulfilling only one of the above: #4. (Not by choice.)
3 comments:
I swear you and I are the same person! :) I laughed at this post. My thoughts EXACTLY.
My mom always told me, even if you do have a "good" day where you get 2 minutes to relax, as soon as hubby drives up, look super busy and exhausted! ....although they still never understand.
I am amazed more and more every day how we can all be so different, yet our situations and thoughts are feelings are all the same!
You took the words right out of my mouth!
I'm really more about the illusion of perfection. Much simpler to attain :D
Nicolle: I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the only one who feels that way! Your mom had it right on the nose! Yes, it is crazy how it seems we all live somewhat parallel lives huh?
Stephanie: I like that: "The illusion of perfection"...nice:-D
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